‘St Peter’ by Christina Rossetti (1830-1894)

St. Peter once: “Lord, dost Thou wash my feet?”—
Much more I say: Lord, dost Thou stand and knock
At my closed heart more rugged than a rock,
Bolted and barred, for Thy soft touch unmeet,  4
Nor garnished nor in any wise made sweet?
Owls roost within and dancing satyrs mock.
Lord, I have heard the crowing of the cock
And have not wept: ah, Lord, Thou knowest it.  8
Yet still I hear Thee knocking, still I hear:
“Open to Me, look on Me eye to eye,
That I may wring thy heart and make it whole;
And teach thee love because I hold thee dear,  12
And sup with thee in gladness soul with soul,
And sup with thee in glory by and by.”

Considering the Poem

There are three voices in this poem. The first line is St Peter’s and expresses his uneasiness at Christ’s washing the feet of the disciples: he knows he is unworthy. The words that begin the second line (‘Much more I say …’) begin the development section of the poem (2-9) in which Christina Rossetti expresses her personal doubts about her own value by identifying herself with St Peter. The final lines (10-14) are God’s words, imagined by the poet and delivered to Christina Rossetti, still identifying with Peter and sharing his self-doubt.

‘*Christ Washing the Apostles’ Feet’ by Meister des Hausbuches 147*5

The poet assumes that her readers remember that Peter was to assume the leadership of the early church and, perhaps oddly in the light of his future leadership, that the gospels present him as a fallible character. Jesus warns Peter at the Last Supper that he would deny him three times before the crowing of the cock on the following day. This is exactly what he does. Peter is the apostle that, in his weakness, seems most like us all. Yet, he is chosen to carry out a difficult task: Jesus has also told him that, ‘thou art Peter, and upon this rock, I will build my church’ (Matthew 16:18).

Christina Rossetti describes, with painful irony, her heart as a rock (3). The metaphor here indicates not soundness but the hardness of a heart ‘closed’ to the ‘soft’ (4) touch of Jesus’ hand. She has identified imaginatively with the disciple and uses his imagery and his unease to express her own self-doubt. Peter may not have been up to the job but she is quite certain that she is not able to serve God. She too has ‘heard the cock crowing’ (7-8) and is ashamed.

Like Peter must have been, she is painfully conscious of her inner weakness and feels ‘bolted and barred’ (4) against the merciful invitation of the Lord. How can He care about the heart of someone who did not even weep (7-8) in shame even when aware of their failure, and whose inside life is a theatre of gothic nastiness, of owls roosting in the gloom, of absurd, cavorting, pagan ‘satyrs’ (6)?

But Jesus’ words that take up most of the final six lines (or, since the poem is a re-purposed Italian sonnet, the sestet) afford hope that arises, like the washing of the disciples’ feet, from the merciful humility of Jesus. He wishes to teach Rossetti ‘love’ because He holds her ‘dear’ (12). He will ‘wring’ (11) her hard heart. This is a punishment made in love and it brings both to a head and to an end the struggle that the poet (and, by implication, Peter) has had with shame and anguished self-hatred.

If this is the climax of the poem, the final two lines are the resolution. Both echo the Last Supper and, of course, the Mass or Eucharist that celebrates and re-enacts it. For Christina Rossetti the moment when she’ll share a supper with the Lord ‘in gladness soul with soul’ (13) is still to come, but ‘by and by’ (14). Christine Rossetti by inhabiting in imagination the mind of St Peter reminds us that faith and Christ’s mercy can right human fallibility.

Suggestions for further Reading